Logical Consequences

Mar. 2, 2007 - Logical Consequences ...
It was my favorite tool to use as a middle school teacher ... I found it effective mainly because it was such a different tool than being used by the majority of teachers or administrators in the building. I found it particularly effective as the parent of a young child ... with great consistency I would tell AJ when we were going anywhere exactly what I expected in the situation (ie ... if you don't go to bed AND go to sleep you are going to be tired tomorrow mornng when we have to get up at 6am so you can go to preschool/school ... I expect you to keep your hands to yourself when we go to the grocery and if you don't when we get home, it will be your job to put all the canned goods in the cabinet ... whatever ... ) For some reason when we brought AJ home to homeschool and I adopted the "I want life to be less stressful/scheduled/hectic __________/.... just fill in the blank I stopped using that tool as much. For one thing, AJ and I are always together, therefore he never has to remember anything ... we are always together so we can complete it in the car ... do it tomorrow ... finish up later ...
AND I CREATED A MONSTER!!
I've seen it coming for a while and tried doing a few things to correct it. This week, it's coming to a head. He has auditions on Saturday and is convinced he can memorize his poem ... tomorrow morning! It isn't going to happen. And, if by some miracle it does ... it won't be great.
I want to rescue him. I don't want him to fail. I don't want him to be embarrassed.
But, I also can't deny how wrapped in his success I am! Prideful about how he does ... will they think I didn't work with him, encourage him, tell him to do it? The truth is I did all of those things. He even told me on Monday ... "Mom, you just don't know."
And, so another lesson is being learned. I have to say, it's beginning to sink in this afternoon ... he's talked about being stressed out ... talked ... he hasn't done anythig about it. He's sitting on the couch listening to his Ipod. Not working on his Latin ... not memorizing his poem ... not memorizing his 12's ... nothing productive. Where does intrinsic motivation come from ... oh yeah ... inside of oneself. Hmmmmm.....