Jun. 23, 2008 - A Little Grace
I consider myself an okay driver. Not because I'm a great driver, but because I am, in my husband's estimation, "painfully careful" ...
I'm careful because I know my limitations. I have zero depth perception (vertical or horizontal) ... I try to not frequent locations I've not scoped out, I try not to position myself in parking spots where I'm going to have to maneuver around to get out ... and I've never had a wreck (well, except for a snowy road in the middle of a midwestern snowstorm ... there was a snow drift, an icy surface and well ... thank the Lord, no other vehicles on the road)!
but no matter how well I know my own weaknesses, try to avoid putting myself in awkward situations and avoid doing the wrong thing ... IT HAPPENS. A curb, a pole, I might have to back up a time or two or six ...
And such was the case on Friday at the Horn of Plenty. I was in a hurry, my mind was elsewhere and I did not notice how full the parking lot was when I started my entry. I managed into a spot fine, picked out peaches for cobbler and Yukon Gold for mashed potatoes and gathered salsa ingredients ... all in record time! Heading toward the Jeep I realized, "Oh, man, how am I gonna get outta there?" and that's when the deep panic set in my gut because I knew I was in over my head. I'd made a hasty decision and now I was going to pay for it.
I was bound to screw up. There was a curb, a busy road, a pole, cars beside me and cars behind me ... all the makings for a disaster. But ... I had to get home and Randy was working ... "OK ... I can do this."
Well, it didn't take15 seconds to know that, 'yes, I could do it, but I couldn't do it without making a mistake."
And the rich little man, in the little silver sportscar wanted to give me grief ... man, did he give me grief ... and believe me, it was completely unnecessary for him to point out what I'd done wrong ...
I KNEW I WAS IN THE MIDDLE OF THE ENTRANCE- I DIDN'T WANT TO BE THERE ANY MORE THAN HE WANTED ME THERE ...
he honked, shouted something out his window at me, pointed to the middle of the entrance and still bumped his tires up on the curb ... none of which helped me get out of the way any more quickly or conveniently for him. I left the parking lot thinking about how stupid I was, how foolish I'd looked ...
and yes, I was slightly honked off at the little man who was so impatient ... but mostly I was just feeling stupid and talking to myself and saying all the things I wanted to say to him ... if he'd just let me get ouf of the mess before jumping in and pointing out all the ways I'd screwed up, I just needed a little space to right what I'd done so wrong ... if he'd just been 15 seconds patient, he wouldn't have hit the curb or made me look foolish, and then I said it, "All I needed was a little Grace" ...
And somewhere in my soul I realized that just about covers life in general. Sometimes, we all just need a little Grace.
How many times do we recognize our sin, but we're in the middle of the garbage we've created around us ... we're even ready to admit that we've messed up (sometimes in horrific ways) ... we just need a little room/time/energy/encouragement to be able to work ourselves out of the middle of the muck. I think how often we look at folks, kids or adults, and we blast them for making a mistake and then for having to maneuver themselves out of the middle of it ... and make no mistake, if there's a mess, there will be consequences to be worked through.
And all that's required is a little grace. Not an exemption from the consequences, just Grace for the moment where they're trying to figure out what the next move is supposed to be.
I didn't have any choice but to continue to pull my car through the middle of the entrance ... I needed another 15 seconds to make right the previous decision. But I was trying.
I needed the little man to give me a minute to work myself out of my mess. Grace, just a little grace. He was on the sidelines in the enviable position of having done it all right! Maybe, just maybe he didn't know what it was like to have done it wrong.
Whatever your IT is today, I pray that the little man in the little sportscar in your life will grant you Grace ... Grace to get yourself out of the pickle your in!